Saying that I miss home so much is an understatement. It is, really.
The thought of being away from my family and my friends still scares me. No, scratch that. It’s already a fact. I am here in the US, away from my comfort zone. And it pains me.
I was very determined to push through. I’ve prayed hard for this to happen. God didn’t failed me.
I knew I would be away from everyone and everything I love so dearly, but I didn’t realized it would be this hard. I was never this weak. NEVER. And I’ve never pictured myself this way. NEVER.
God let this happen. And I believe He would never put me into something I would not be able to overcome. His plans are always better than mine. I’m leaving everything up to Him.
And I’ll never fail Him.
Leaving is hard. And living after leaving is harder.
The month of March has always been a sad month for me. EVERSINCE. You know, goodbyes and all. I hate goodbyes.
That’s why I never bid goodbye to anyone. Because I know that this is just a long see you soon!
Three weeks ago, I left home with a lot of what ifs in my mind.
Now, I’m starting to get answers for all these questions.
This is what I know I wanted. And no matter how hard everything could be, I know I would never give up. I would hold on to this.
If this is what it takes to be someone who you want to be, go. As the saying goes, “If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead you anywhere.”
I feel so uneasy these past few days. I miss home. I miss everyone. I miss everything.
I came to this point that I felt like the more I spend my days here, the more I deprive myself of all the happiness I could’ve felt if I didn’t went here.
But I’m keeping my faith. I know everything has its own purpose. God wants me to learn from this. He wants me to grow— he wants me to be a better version of myself.
Time flies. And I can’t wait ‘til I travel 8493 miles back home.