Saying that I miss home so much is an understatement. It is, really.
The thought of being away from my family and my friends still scares me. No, scratch that. It’s already a fact. I am here in the US, away from my comfort zone. And it pains me.
I was very determined to push through. I’ve prayed hard for this to happen. God didn’t failed me.
I knew I would be away from everyone and everything I love so dearly, but I didn’t realized it would be this hard. I was never this weak. NEVER. And I’ve never pictured myself this way. NEVER.
God let this happen. And I believe He would never put me into something I would not be able to overcome. His plans are always better than mine. I’m leaving everything up to Him.
And I’ll never fail Him.
***
Leaving is hard. And living after leaving is harder.
The month of March has always been a sad month for me. EVERSINCE. You know, goodbyes and all. I hate goodbyes.
That’s why I never bid goodbye to anyone. Because I know that this is just a long see you soon!
Three weeks ago, I left home with a lot of what ifs in my mind.
Now, I’m starting to get answers for all these questions.
This is what I know I wanted. And no matter how hard everything could be, I know I would never give up. I would hold on to this.
If this is what it takes to be someone who you want to be, go. As the saying goes, “If you can find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn’t lead you anywhere.”
***
I feel so uneasy these past few days. I miss home. I miss everyone. I miss everything.
I came to this point that I felt like the more I spend my days here, the more I deprive myself of all the happiness I could’ve felt if I didn’t went here.
But I’m keeping my faith. I know everything has its own purpose. God wants me to learn from this. He wants me to grow— he wants me to be a better version of myself.
***
Time flies. And I can’t wait ‘til I travel 8493 miles back home.